Silent Yelling and the Myth of Being Unprepared


“Mom, there were about twenty different ways you could have handled that.”

Although my preteen son got a scolding for saying so, he was much too right.

I had just given my kids a Silent Yelling. To the tender souls who may not be familiar with this particular parental move, let me explain. Some of us get very upset at our sweetie-poos and at the exact same moment we are in absolute disbelief at their behavior. This can result in yelling, but in a pinched whisper. It is a barely audible rant with words coming out in very. short. sentences. This whispered yell is best done with a scowl or a glare, leaving children slightly confused. She’s whispering but it doesn’t seem like she has a good secret. 

Are we all on the same page now?

Yes son, I could have handled that twenty better ways.

In the next few conversation with God and my kids, I used the words “I’m sorry” a lot. Because I was. Especially since I was intending to test out a new idea I had stumbled upon a few weeks before.

While scrawling in my journal earlier, I started bemoaning my hard life. How would I ever find the energy to nurture and empower all of these kids? My life is the berries. Chaos is the norm and kind sanity out of reach. I felt totally overwhelmed, definitely outnumbered, and ill-prepared. There is no way I could do this.

But I heard a voice in my head:
You have what it takes.
I have given you every tool you need to do the job in front of you.
If you need it, you’ve got it. Period, the end, all done.

I am a skeptic. Really? Everything?

But as I explored this further, I found this idea from Paul:

“In Christ you have been made rich in every way…
So you have every gift from God while you wait for Jesus.”
(found in 1 Corinthians 1)

I found myself believing that it could be true. That whatever situation I found myself in, God had already snuck something useful into my tool belt for that exact moment and I needed to remember to grope around until I found it.

Which is what I totally didn’t do the morning of the Silent Yell.

If this is true for me, then I believe it is true for you too, Parent.

What do you need for your week? What do you need to parent that kid who has been sassing the heck out of you and to parent that one who collapses in a whinefest every and all afternoon?

Wisdom? Patience? Ideas? Organization? Empathy? Perseverance?

God is handing us all of the good things we desperately need; we have what it takes to succeed at parenting. We are far from unprepared.

That raspy rant of mine? I am hoping to see less and less of it. And possibly the louder yelling and the loudest yelling too.

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